FEBRUARY 1, 2024

ARTICLE BY MOTHER MAGE

i just wanna know, how often do you find yourself endlessly scrolling down your feed with no end goal in mind, essentially just trying to feel something? or, fill something in this case. don’t shoot the messenger, but a lot of us are attempting to fill a void that we may or may not be aware of. i’m merely coming to you as an accountability buddy, and i want you to ask yourself: are you using social media or is social media using you?

when we create profiles for these platforms, the gesture is usually innocent. i mean, it’s 2024, who doesn’t have an instagram, tiktok, or twitter account by now? the evolution of technology and the internet has singlehandedly made it super easy for us to connect with others no matter where they are located in the world, allowing us to share cultures, experiences, beliefs, and ideas. who wouldn’t show interest in having the world at their finger tips? constant access to the latest trends, art, music, and news around the world? yeah, sign me up!

here’s the thing, i’ve personally realized that too much of anything isn’t good for us— considering the fact that everything has a yin and a yang aspect. dark and light. good and bad. balance is key. somehow, over time, the lines have blurred and we’ve pretty much lost sight of what truly defines us, due to overindulgence in social media spaces. i’ve been placing so much emphasis on self definition in my blog posts lately because it’s really crucial at the time to block out the noise and hone in on our own inner voices, to assist us with aligning with our higher selves.

social media culture has convinced us to make damn near every aspect of our lives ‘content’ to post, because the stimulation we receive from instant feed back on our posts feels great in the moment. in most cases, the content literally pays. in bank notes and in attention too. receiving the likes, the comments and the reposts triggers the release of dopamine in our brains. this leads to us craving more social validation which leads to us constantly engaging with each platform. another vicious cycle that we willingly participate in.

it’s funny because as i reflect on this, i hear “who cares when it feels like crack?” ringing in my head (lyrics from kiss it better by rihanna), and that’s funny to me because that’s exactly what it is when you realllllly think about it. it’s an addiction. it’s the reason why a lot of people feel like they have to announce that they want to log out and “take a break.” it’s the reason why people have a hard time taking a break from scrolling and interacting online in general. that little devil on our shoulder starts speaking fear-based notions into our ear, making us feel like we’ll miss out on something if we look away. this is especially true for those of us that run internet/social media based businesses, which makes shit even trickier.

the desire to stay connected to our phones has birthed and nurtured the need for instant gratification. the craving of constant stimulation has essentially manifested as a huge distraction and total confidence killer. many of us sleep by our phones, take them to the bathroom with us, etc. and it seems normal because it’s a common habit, but i tend to deeply analyze things, and the topic at hand is one that i can’t seem to shake. i was already in deep thought about this, then a friend “coincidentally” brought it up to me in conversation. i do believe that round the clock connection is not serving us as much as we like to think it is. however, it’s truly all about intention.

what happens when the gratification is delayed?

we let it convince us that we aren’t worthy, we aren’t supported, blah blah blah. i just want everyone to realize that it’s honestly all a bullshit illusion. it’s a trap. the things we see on social media (especially when it comes to lifestyle content) is literally only a small percentage of what people choose to show. we have no idea what was sacrificed for said peers to get to that place or to obtain the things they have. even though someone can absolutely be relatable, we’re all different. becoming discouraged after incessantly scrolling and comparing our lives to others, or becoming insecure because your last post didn’t get hundreds and thousands of likes is proof of how instant gratification (or the lack thereof) adds to the behavioral traits that make imposter syndrome what it is.

what’s the solution to this problem? mindfulness. accountability. discipline. being aware of how much screen time is being accumulated daily, taking regular breaks from the internet — or from our devices in general — is a great start. the algorithm is curated to keep our eyes glued to our screens and to convince us to constantly be a part of it. i personally like to rebel occasionally, to clear my mind and call my energy back by way of a dopamine detox for 1-2 weeks each month.

don’t get it confused, even i have a hard time not giving in to my bad social media habit. i’m definitely not the poster child for discipline, but i am more than willing to take full accountability for my participation in every connection i have — whether digital, physical, emotional, or mental — that no longer serves me, and to free myself from negative attachments. you should consider this too. the world is yours.